not so s t r o n g ::open::

[violethorses]

It was late, well past curfew and Azzurra knew that she should've been asleep, but despite how tired she was, she couldn't fall asleep. She tiptoed down to the common room and took a seat in the chair by the fire. Azzurra pulled her legs up to her chest and stared into the flames.

She knew what was bothering her, and it wasn't anything new. What was new was that she was trying to hide her pain. She smiled for Zelphar now, tried to assure him that she was fine. Azzurra smiled for everyone, though the smiles sometimes hurt more than the tears. She was pretending to be something that she wasn't.

Azzurra wasn't strong and she knew it. She wanted to curl up in a ball and die sometimes and she felt like she hadn't slept in months. Not only was she a fake, she was broken. She didn't think that it would ever change, not even Alec could take back what he had done. It made her feel helpless and small.

When the tears started to come down her pale cheeks, Azzurra didn't try to stop them. She knew that it would only make it worse. She sobbed as quietly as she could, hoping that no one would come down to the common room at this time of night. Between sobs she gasped for breath, her throat feeling raw. Azzurra heard footsteps coming from the dormitories and she quickly tried to wipe all the tears from her face, knowing it was a hopeless cause.

[julie]

Julie padded down the stairs, her brown hair tossed up into a sloppy ponytail, her slippers not making a sound against the stone floor. She was going to sneak out... again. Lately when she could not sleep due to nightmares of her father she would head up to the Room of Requirement, where she would work on her paintings until she felt drowsy enough to attempt sleep again. She stopped when she saw Azzurra, she would be stuck tonight. But the prefect was crying... "What's wrong?" Julie asked softly, keeping her own pain hidden the best she could manage.

((OOC: I thought that Julie and Azzurra could connect well, perhaps be friends?))

[violethorses]

Azzurra mentally hit herself for being so stupid. She should've gone out of the common room if she was going to cry like this. Any Hufflepuff could walk in on her here. But she found herself glad that it was Julie, whom she had witnessed sobbing hysterically about a week ago. Azzurra had to breathe deeply to steady herself when Julie asked what was wrong. After a couple of moments, she was no longer sobbing, merely crying. "Last spring, after the school dance," Azzurra began in a hoarse voice, then had to pause. She had never actually said what had happened to her before. Zelphar had just figured it out. "My boyfriend, um, raped me." The last words were very small sounding and then a new wave of sobs came over Azzurra.

((OOC: That sounds good.))

[julie]

Julie felt her throat tighten, she was not alone as she had previously thought. Not caring about standard personal space boundaries, she seated herself on the arm of the chair where Azzurra was- a comforting hand finding a place on her shoulder. Should she tell? Azzurra had just confided in her what she had not told to anyone but Seamus and Hyperion. "What I was crying about last week," Julie began, already feeling her heart seize up and her eyes sting, "my father was abusive toward my siblings and myself. Last month he-" she paused, willing herself not to cry just yet. "stole my virginity." Julie kept quiet, trying to be of comfort to Azzurra. This probably was not an accident that they met that night.

[violethorses]

Azzurra's throat tightened a little bit more at Julie's words. It was horrible to think that her own father would do something like that to her. "I'm so sorry," Azzurra whispered. She scooted over in the over-sized armchair slightly so that Julie could sit more comfortably if she wanted to. Now Azzurra felt the need to comfort Julie, but she knew that she couldn't stop crying. She was now very glad that it was Julie that had come down to the common room. Azzurra didn't think anyone could relate to her better than Julie at this point.

[julie]

Julie bit her lip, not sure if she regretted telling Azzurra or not. There was now another person that would know she really wasn't all that happy. She slid down onto the seat beside Azzurra, her tiny frame fitting in easily. "We can be a pity-party for two, now," Julie said softly. She felt tears coming to her own eyes, at least now she would have someone to cry with that understood her pain.

[violethorses]

Azzurra thought vaguely that Julie's comment was funny, but it didn't make her laugh at this point. "I guess so," she replied between her tears. Normally Azzurra hated crying in front of other people, but this seemed different, especially now that Julie was crying as well and she shared the same pain as Azzurra.

[julie]

Julie fell silent, feeling as if there wasn't anything that needed to be said. She allowed her tears to fall, but did not sob, she had perfected the art of crying quietly to not bring any attention to herself. Julie's father typically got worse when she started to cry, or if he heard her doing so. She gave an involuntary shudder at the memories that resurfaced in her mind at the mere thought prompt. Without a word, Julie slipped her arm around Azzurra's shoulder, trying to be of some physical comfort.

[violethorses]

Azzurra sobbed quietly and after a moment, wrapped an arm around Julie like the other girl was doing for her. It was definitely nice to have told someone besides Zelphar. Memories flooded Azzurra's brain and for a moment she thought she would choke, but she just sobbed a bit harder. She noticed that Julie was crying silently and thought for a moment that the other girl must have spent a lot of time crying. It was horrible to think about.

[julie]

Julie didn't think it necessary to say anything, at least not at that particular moment. She just decided that she would be there for support. Both she and Azzurra had shared the critical first step with one another, and that in itself was more than enough for one meeting. Julie felt compelled to ask Azzurra not to share that bit of information with anyone, but the both of them were crying too hard for requests of that particular nature.

[violethorses]

Azzurra bit her lip, now trying to stop her flood of tears. She hated being like this, it seemed stupid to cry just then. But as much as she tried, she couldn't stop. Azzurra thought briefly of asking Julie not to tell anyone what she had shared with her, but she didn't think the other girl would say anything, just as Azzurra wouldn't bring up what had happened to Julie. It was too personal.

[julie]

"It h-hurts more if you try t-to stop before you've f-finished," Julie said quietly between her silent sobs. She knew this all too well, which was why she so enjoyed her time alone, then she could let out everything before slipping in amongst her peers. Julie was never comfortable crying in front of others, spare for her siblings and Hyperion and Seamus. She went to them for comfort, but hopefully now Azzurra would be an option as well.